Tag Archives: reconnection

Christianity, faith, Greek Orthodox, happiness

Food for thought #4

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Wasn’t sure I was going to write this today, been a little out of sorts and tired today.

So when they had eaten breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me more than these?” He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I love You.” He said to him, “Feed My lambs.”† He said to him again a second time, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me?” He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I love You.” He said to him, “Tend My sheep.” He said to him the third time, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me?” Peter was grieved because He said to him the third time, “Do you love Me?” And he said to Him, “Lord, You know all things; You know that I love You.” Jesus said to him, “Feed My sheep. Most assuredly, I say to you, when you were younger, you girded yourself and walked where you wished; but when you are old, you will stretch out your hands, and another will gird you and carry you where you do not wish.”† This He spoke, signifying by what death he would glorify God. And when He had spoken this, He said to him, “Follow Me.” (John 21:15-19, OSB)

This is one of my favorite passages because there’s a story here that means more than just the words on the page: here is the gist-

When Christ asks Peter the first time ‘do you love me?’ If you’re reading the passage in the original Greek…he uses Agape (all encompassing, move heaven and earth kind of love) when Peter answers- he answers him with Filakia (a brotherly, friendship kind of love)

Christ asks again with Agape- Peter answers again with Filakia

Then Christ comes down to Peter’s level and asks him if he loves him-Filakia and Peter, while wearied (I believe with himself ) confirms the Filakia level of love.

I think the biggest lesson to me is that even while he was here among us, he was able to come to us and understand and meet us at our level. (He knows we’re better than we acknowledge or try to be, but he meets us where we are until we understand the concept of moving heaven and earth ourselves with our love for Him.

That’s all I got for today,

All the best

A

country life, faith, Greek Orthodox, happiness, hello: goodbye, hospital, Life, Travel, wonder

When I was 17, I wrote a poem that was published in my high school ’paper’

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It was a poem about my biological father. I can only remember snippets of it to this day.

two parts I remember:

‘Tis eighteen years since we last met, I’m only seventeen. I barely know to be my dad; a man I’ve never seen.’

And the end of poem:

‘Would I have been a daddy’s girl, if I had had a dad? Or would you be just like the rest, and make me very sad?’

When I was 36, I finally met the man I’d wanted my whole life to know. The man I’d daydream busting with pride because I was in the army and following his footsteps even without him being there. (He was a green beret, sniper, in Vietnam)

My dad was the ultimate disappointment in life. He was a perverse old man who though he knew about all of his kids (there were at least 5 of us) he took responsibility in life for none of them. Claimed no knowledge, but had photos of all of us when we were babies there in his home.

He died of lung cancer in February when I was 40. His family treated me and my children like a nobody at his funeral because all his other children looked like him. I didn’t favor him in any way. (My grandma used to say I was nobody’s kid, because I looked like nobody I was supposed to look like in her opinion.)

Despite all this, I’m glad I got to know the truth on him, that he wasn’t the man I watched for in all the drill sergeants and instructors I had while I was in the army. He was just as ordinary as any other man, and a purposeful deadbeat at best.

Sorry for the dark and twisty start to the day.

All the best,

A

(Craig, I also wrote about Christ when in elementary…about keeping Christ in Christmas, I think I was 4th or 5th grade. He wasn’t ever allowed to be present much in my schools growing up: atheists will tell you that’s a separation of church and state, I believe it’s just one more way to keep their thumb on believers- but o see it as one more way Christ separates the wheat from the chaff, enough trials like that and the chaff will fall away…the wheat won’t…just my 2 cents)

(Also Craig, per Luke, the Holy Spirit forbade them from preaching in Asia. Maybe there was a reason the Asian churches fell away? (Acts 16:6-7) )

country life, employment, faith, Greek Orthodox, happiness, Life

Good morning

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It’s quarter after 6, I’ve been awake since right at 3:30, when the little guy I’m dating decided to ‘like’ one of my photos on his phone.

I’ve had my first cup of coffee and unloaded the dishwasher and loaded the dryer. Will start a fresh load of dishes and wash here in a bit, then feed animals and get dressed to go to Prattville farm swap this morning (looking to buy a few more laying hens)

Nothing overly thrilling going on here these days, been working on getting things back in place for my nursing job, and that’s tedious at best. Supposed to possibly be going to Texas the first week of February for a listing…if it doesn’t sell before then. Less than enthused as it’s been sitting on the market for 3 months with no bites and I’m just not sure what I’m up against at this point.

Quail have gotten quite fat and I’m starting to wonder if I may be over-feeding them. I do like going out to visit them and feel compelled to fill their feeder a few times a day (it’s an awful small feeder for 5-6 per cage)chickens have also gotten quite fat lately, they and the opossums really enjoy my kitchen scraps and leftovers.

Goats…also fat 🙃 but I think the girls are pregnant and should be due mid April (around the 13th).

I still miss my husband every day and wish he was still around. I miss feeling loved and like I really matter to another person.

I hope you have a blessed weekend. I’m looking forward to the farm swap this morning and cow roping this afternoon and church tomorrow.

Catch you soon!

A

Travel

What is love (baby don’t hurt me…no more )

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It is 14:44, I’m lying here listening to my relatively new husband sleep on the phone, no less than 650 miles away. He has work in less than 2 and a half hours, and the new schedule is wearing him out.

Lying here thinking as he’s sleeping, about something he said to me a month or 2 ago, I’d asked him how he knew he loved me, he said something I had never heard before, but when I sit and think about it, it makes me happy, and it gives me hope we can make this last.

His answer was simple, he told me that he felt something with me that he waited to feel with others and hoped to feel with others…but with me it was just there. He has told he’s felt it before, with his first wife.

Being married is surreal, my relationships up until now haven’t given me much hope about love, there have been several elements in them that I try to trust won’t happen in this marriage, sometimes fear of those elements causes me to lose sight of what’s in front of me, and sometimes I panic when we hit a speed bump.

Pay and I met almost 20 years ago, we dated for almost 6 months, and we fell apart. A lot was my doing, but not all. There were fears at the time that kept me from moving forward, and I’m not sure I would have married him then anyway, had life not pulled us apart.

Our reconnection, feels like we didn’t miss a beat, but somehow lost almost 2 decades. He’s hard to get along with at times, but so am I. Either way, I look forward to the rest of my life with him.

Travel

What is love (baby don’t hurt me…no more )

Leave a comment

It is 14:44, I’m lying here listening to my relatively new husband sleep on the phone, no less than 650 miles away. He has work in less than 2 and a half hours, and the new schedule is wearing him out.

Lying here thinking as he’s sleeping, about something he said to me a month or 2 ago, I’d asked him how he knew he loved me, he said something I had never heard before, but when I sit and think about it, it makes me happy, and it gives me hope we can make this last.

His answer was simple, he told me that he felt something with me that he waited to feel with others and hoped to feel with others…but with me it was just there. He has told he’s felt it before, with his first wife.

Being married is surreal, my relationships up until now haven’t given me much hope about love, there have been several elements in them that I try to trust won’t happen in this marriage, sometimes fear of those elements causes me to lose sight of what’s in front of me, and sometimes I panic when we hit a speed bump.

Pay and I met almost 20 years ago, we dated for almost 6 months, and we fell apart. A lot was my doing, but not all. There were fears at the time that kept me from moving forward, and I’m not sure I would have married him then anyway, had life not pulled us apart.

Our reconnection, feels like we didn’t miss a beat, but somehow lost almost 2 decades. He’s hard to get along with at times, but so am I. Either way, I look forward to the rest of my life with him.