Tag Archives: gratitude

faith, Greek Orthodox, happiness, Travel

Food for thought #2

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Todays thought isn’t a verse but part of a familiar story:

And Peter answered Him and said, “Lord, if it is You, command me to come to You on the water.”† So He said, “Come.” And when Peter had come down out of the boat, he walked on the water to go to Jesus. But when he saw that the wind was boisterous, he was afraid; and beginning to sink he cried out, saying, “Lord, save me!” And immediately Jesus stretched out His hand and caught him, and said to him, “O you of little faith, why did you doubt?”† (Matthew 14:28-31, OSB)

I think what stands out here to me is the human propensity to freak out when things start to get a little rough in life. If you examine it closely, Peter’s doubt wasn’t in Christ’s ability to save him, he had no doubt there, where he doubted was that Christ already had him protected and covered.

We stress a lot in life, it’s easy to be upset on how life is going and even sometimes feel like maybe God doesn’t have out back. But sometimes it’s our own freak outs that cause everything to go south. We don’t hand it to God and trust that he has our back, we pseudo hand it to him and decide he’s not going to help us…for whatever reason.

We need to trust God a little more and our own thoughts a little less.

All the best,

A

Christianity, faith, Greek Orthodox, happiness, Uncategorized

Food for thought #1

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This is going to be a new series of posts, separate from my day to day. Based on my own thoughts on some of my favorite Bible verses and my own reflections on them. Things I think about while doing simple things such as doing the dishes or feeding the animals around my little homestead. They are my own personal take and thoughts. That, to me, is the Joy of God’s Word, it pertains to you how it pertains to you, its ‘living’ in that even that meaning changes throughout your life. So…here goes:

“Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you cleanse the outside of the cup and dish, but inside they are full of extortion and self-indulgence. Blind Pharisee, first cleanse the inside of the cup and dish, that the outside of them may be clean also. (Matthew 23:25-26, OSB)

This isn’t the only time this thought process is presented to us in The Word and it’s one that plays often in my mind, especially when I’m doing dishes, (also I feel that so many of the things shared with us were meant to be relatable to everyday life (planting, cleaning…) because they’re meant to bring the verses or thoughts to mind in the day-to-day of humdrum life.

To me, this verse is telling us to worry more about our thoughts, and even our words that come out of our mouth than we are our outward appearance.

Let’s face it, you can spend two to three hundred on a really nice outfit, and go out to hit the town, and if you treat people hatefully or rudely, or even if you are thinking hateful or rude thoughts (believe me when I say that these do spill over into your actions and mannerisms) all the finery in the world doesn’t make you a better person.

I believe Christ meant it more in the contact of sinning, don’t think about what others have in a manner that is jealous or plot to take what someone else has away. Don’t think hateful thoughts about other people, wishing ill of them or wishing their demise. These are what lead to things like theft, adultery, and even murder…you generally get consumed with the thoughts before you take the first step towards hurting another person in this manner.

Anyway basically, my general thought on it is ‘keep your thoughts in check, and you won’t have things to ask forgiveness for further down the road’

All the best

A

country life, faith, Greek Orthodox, happiness, hello: goodbye, hospital, Life, Travel, wonder

When I was 17, I wrote a poem that was published in my high school ’paper’

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It was a poem about my biological father. I can only remember snippets of it to this day.

two parts I remember:

‘Tis eighteen years since we last met, I’m only seventeen. I barely know to be my dad; a man I’ve never seen.’

And the end of poem:

‘Would I have been a daddy’s girl, if I had had a dad? Or would you be just like the rest, and make me very sad?’

When I was 36, I finally met the man I’d wanted my whole life to know. The man I’d daydream busting with pride because I was in the army and following his footsteps even without him being there. (He was a green beret, sniper, in Vietnam)

My dad was the ultimate disappointment in life. He was a perverse old man who though he knew about all of his kids (there were at least 5 of us) he took responsibility in life for none of them. Claimed no knowledge, but had photos of all of us when we were babies there in his home.

He died of lung cancer in February when I was 40. His family treated me and my children like a nobody at his funeral because all his other children looked like him. I didn’t favor him in any way. (My grandma used to say I was nobody’s kid, because I looked like nobody I was supposed to look like in her opinion.)

Despite all this, I’m glad I got to know the truth on him, that he wasn’t the man I watched for in all the drill sergeants and instructors I had while I was in the army. He was just as ordinary as any other man, and a purposeful deadbeat at best.

Sorry for the dark and twisty start to the day.

All the best,

A

(Craig, I also wrote about Christ when in elementary…about keeping Christ in Christmas, I think I was 4th or 5th grade. He wasn’t ever allowed to be present much in my schools growing up: atheists will tell you that’s a separation of church and state, I believe it’s just one more way to keep their thumb on believers- but o see it as one more way Christ separates the wheat from the chaff, enough trials like that and the chaff will fall away…the wheat won’t…just my 2 cents)

(Also Craig, per Luke, the Holy Spirit forbade them from preaching in Asia. Maybe there was a reason the Asian churches fell away? (Acts 16:6-7) )

country life, employment, faith, Greek Orthodox, happiness, Life

Good morning

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It’s quarter after 6, I’ve been awake since right at 3:30, when the little guy I’m dating decided to ‘like’ one of my photos on his phone.

I’ve had my first cup of coffee and unloaded the dishwasher and loaded the dryer. Will start a fresh load of dishes and wash here in a bit, then feed animals and get dressed to go to Prattville farm swap this morning (looking to buy a few more laying hens)

Nothing overly thrilling going on here these days, been working on getting things back in place for my nursing job, and that’s tedious at best. Supposed to possibly be going to Texas the first week of February for a listing…if it doesn’t sell before then. Less than enthused as it’s been sitting on the market for 3 months with no bites and I’m just not sure what I’m up against at this point.

Quail have gotten quite fat and I’m starting to wonder if I may be over-feeding them. I do like going out to visit them and feel compelled to fill their feeder a few times a day (it’s an awful small feeder for 5-6 per cage)chickens have also gotten quite fat lately, they and the opossums really enjoy my kitchen scraps and leftovers.

Goats…also fat 🙃 but I think the girls are pregnant and should be due mid April (around the 13th).

I still miss my husband every day and wish he was still around. I miss feeling loved and like I really matter to another person.

I hope you have a blessed weekend. I’m looking forward to the farm swap this morning and cow roping this afternoon and church tomorrow.

Catch you soon!

A

country life, faith, happiness, hospital, legal, Travel

And so it goes…

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Random musings for the week:

So, me writing daily just isn’t going to happen, I think of things I want to write all day, I even say them in my head and sort them and everything but then I decide that no real audience exists for a 49 year old woman’s rants or whatever.

Here are some of my thoughts for the week though:

I’ve been clearing more and more on my land with the Greenworks zero turn, it can really do some damage and is a little powerhouse. I was afraid it wouldn’t be and also was afraid to try a zero turn…:I won’t say she doesn’t have flaws (she should come with 2 full sets of batteries so you have less down time and the left front guide tire on mine has been off its wheel base since the day I bought it, which makes it hard to control at times but I also don’t know that I’d know how to get it back on myself.

I spent a few days last week looking through my months of January and February last year. I still feel I should have recourse against this hospital (as well as the one here in town for a completely different incident). I believe I’ll look again for a lawyer to talk to, my problem is, these lawyers don’t even care enough to have a conversation with you past looking at medical records. I get that the hospitals write all their stuff up just so…but sometimes it’s just not reality (I’m sorry I’ve been a nurse way too long and seen way too much over the years to think it is.

Goats should be due with babies around April 13-15, I look forward to that. My new quail have had a few hiccups (lost 6 of the 28 in less than a week due to me getting an inadequate shelter for them and having little to no visibility on their wellbeing. I have them in proper shelter now and can see them and have good accounts on the remaining birds well being. Unfortunately I also have them in the barn with the barn door open while it’s chilly out, and this means I have other random birds scouting my barn out to build their nests inside.

I still very much want to establish my flock of jubilee Orpington’s as well as a few other Orpington breeds, however I may wait a few years before I pursue that harder.

Can’t wait for my garden this year, have garlic growing full force already.

I’ll write more next week I hope. Hope you’re staying safe in the winter storms if they affect you.

Beat!

Amanda

Christianity, faith, Greek Orthodox, happiness, hello: goodbye, Life, Travel, Uncategorized, wonder

So, mostly a humdrum kind of day today.

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Up and did chores today, didn’t take time to walk to the garden area today because I had other things in my head.

Dental appointment this afternoon, my face is still numb and it’s been nearly 5 hours. Picked picnic stuff up for dinner tonight and had an easy night.

Grabbed a mini rose plant because my husband loved those, going to work on planting a handful of those in between the regular roses this year.

Have an appointment at 10 tomorrow for the truck to get his tires looked at and also to see why the windshield washers aren’t working, went ahead and did most of tomorrows chores tonight.

I’m really into reading my Bible for just over a year now, just got into the gospels this week, 2 chapters into Mark at the moment. Loving the reading.

Watching the chosen, I like most of it but hate when they sneak modern agendas into a timeline it didn’t exist in.

Hope you’re well, have a blessed day/week!!

Amanda

faith, Travel

I haven’t written in a while, have had a lot going on, and a lot of thoughts tumble through my head daily.

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I still miss my husband, more than words can express, and I still feel the hospital that had him, killed him. I knew the cancer could take him, but everything in me screams that this wasn’t the cancer. I am talking to lawyers and hoping I can get one who sees enough merit in what I’m telling them to take my case.

Little issues since he’s been gone, lawnmower issues that were above my wheelhouse (and Pay taught me to do a lot on my own) the well went out last week, and the washer quit working this weekend. The cost to replace the well was just over 200, the washer was going to exceed 700 when all was said and done, and the dryer had already been taking 3-4 cycles at an hour each to dry a load; so I opted to scrap (Lulu picked up yesterday) and buy a used set from an appliance store in Prattville. The new washer and dryer will be here today. I will be sad to lose my front loaders, but I guess this is life.

I’ve been working out more, and trying to manage the day to day here. Had some business on the real estate side of things, but sadly have had troubles getting myself to work a nursing shift since Pay’s passing. I am afraid of how I will react when I see a nurse or Aide refuse to take care of a patients needs. My fists clench at the very thought…I’ve seen it a lot in my career and usually am the one to pick the slack up…but for now, I’m afraid of how much it will make me break down.

I’m reading a book called the magic, by Rhonda Byrne…so far I’m enjoying it, it’s about embracing gratitude fully. I needed that in my life right now.

I am thankful for the time that I got with my husband, however brief it was. I am thankful that I’m the one who lost him the way I did because I had loved him a long time and know that if he’d died and I never got to hold his hand, hug him, kiss him or all the other intimacies that come in a marriage again…I would have been crushed much more than I already am, though I would maybe also not have seen all he went through or felt as uptight about those in the medical profession as I do today.

I am thankful for my little home in the country, my son and daughter are more relaxed and different people here than they ever were in Frisco. I an more at peace here and still see Payton in everything around me. Im looking forward to more repairs and making the house more and more a home: Cleaning the barn this fall once the weather is cooler. Im thankful for so many little details, but mostly I’m thankful for all he brought into my life.

I will close for now, I hope you are all blessed. Take care.

~Amanda