Tag Archives: emotions

faith, Greek Orthodox, happiness, Travel

Food for thought #2

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Todays thought isn’t a verse but part of a familiar story:

And Peter answered Him and said, “Lord, if it is You, command me to come to You on the water.”† So He said, “Come.” And when Peter had come down out of the boat, he walked on the water to go to Jesus. But when he saw that the wind was boisterous, he was afraid; and beginning to sink he cried out, saying, “Lord, save me!” And immediately Jesus stretched out His hand and caught him, and said to him, “O you of little faith, why did you doubt?”† (Matthew 14:28-31, OSB)

I think what stands out here to me is the human propensity to freak out when things start to get a little rough in life. If you examine it closely, Peter’s doubt wasn’t in Christ’s ability to save him, he had no doubt there, where he doubted was that Christ already had him protected and covered.

We stress a lot in life, it’s easy to be upset on how life is going and even sometimes feel like maybe God doesn’t have out back. But sometimes it’s our own freak outs that cause everything to go south. We don’t hand it to God and trust that he has our back, we pseudo hand it to him and decide he’s not going to help us…for whatever reason.

We need to trust God a little more and our own thoughts a little less.

All the best,

A

country life, faith, Greek Orthodox, happiness, hello: goodbye, hospital, Life, Travel, wonder

When I was 17, I wrote a poem that was published in my high school ’paper’

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It was a poem about my biological father. I can only remember snippets of it to this day.

two parts I remember:

‘Tis eighteen years since we last met, I’m only seventeen. I barely know to be my dad; a man I’ve never seen.’

And the end of poem:

‘Would I have been a daddy’s girl, if I had had a dad? Or would you be just like the rest, and make me very sad?’

When I was 36, I finally met the man I’d wanted my whole life to know. The man I’d daydream busting with pride because I was in the army and following his footsteps even without him being there. (He was a green beret, sniper, in Vietnam)

My dad was the ultimate disappointment in life. He was a perverse old man who though he knew about all of his kids (there were at least 5 of us) he took responsibility in life for none of them. Claimed no knowledge, but had photos of all of us when we were babies there in his home.

He died of lung cancer in February when I was 40. His family treated me and my children like a nobody at his funeral because all his other children looked like him. I didn’t favor him in any way. (My grandma used to say I was nobody’s kid, because I looked like nobody I was supposed to look like in her opinion.)

Despite all this, I’m glad I got to know the truth on him, that he wasn’t the man I watched for in all the drill sergeants and instructors I had while I was in the army. He was just as ordinary as any other man, and a purposeful deadbeat at best.

Sorry for the dark and twisty start to the day.

All the best,

A

(Craig, I also wrote about Christ when in elementary…about keeping Christ in Christmas, I think I was 4th or 5th grade. He wasn’t ever allowed to be present much in my schools growing up: atheists will tell you that’s a separation of church and state, I believe it’s just one more way to keep their thumb on believers- but o see it as one more way Christ separates the wheat from the chaff, enough trials like that and the chaff will fall away…the wheat won’t…just my 2 cents)

(Also Craig, per Luke, the Holy Spirit forbade them from preaching in Asia. Maybe there was a reason the Asian churches fell away? (Acts 16:6-7) )

country life, employment, faith, Greek Orthodox, happiness, Life

Good morning

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It’s quarter after 6, I’ve been awake since right at 3:30, when the little guy I’m dating decided to ‘like’ one of my photos on his phone.

I’ve had my first cup of coffee and unloaded the dishwasher and loaded the dryer. Will start a fresh load of dishes and wash here in a bit, then feed animals and get dressed to go to Prattville farm swap this morning (looking to buy a few more laying hens)

Nothing overly thrilling going on here these days, been working on getting things back in place for my nursing job, and that’s tedious at best. Supposed to possibly be going to Texas the first week of February for a listing…if it doesn’t sell before then. Less than enthused as it’s been sitting on the market for 3 months with no bites and I’m just not sure what I’m up against at this point.

Quail have gotten quite fat and I’m starting to wonder if I may be over-feeding them. I do like going out to visit them and feel compelled to fill their feeder a few times a day (it’s an awful small feeder for 5-6 per cage)chickens have also gotten quite fat lately, they and the opossums really enjoy my kitchen scraps and leftovers.

Goats…also fat 🙃 but I think the girls are pregnant and should be due mid April (around the 13th).

I still miss my husband every day and wish he was still around. I miss feeling loved and like I really matter to another person.

I hope you have a blessed weekend. I’m looking forward to the farm swap this morning and cow roping this afternoon and church tomorrow.

Catch you soon!

A

country life, faith, happiness, Life, Travel, wonder

Good morning (for a few more minutes here anyway)

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Been a busy couple of days, but most of it has felt like I’m spinning my wheels more so than getting anything done.

My nursing ‘job’ (freelance site where I can pick up shifts) has given me a large handful of hoops to jump, tomorrow is the second half of my advanced cardiovascular life support class, I’ve done background check and drug test, next is tb test and a handful of immunizations.

My cell phone is broken, the charge port seems to be broken and it doesn’t seem to catch my chargers at all, I am using the wireless charger for now but as much as I use my CarPlay in the vehicles, it bothers me to be without the port.hopefully I can get that fixed today.

My baking efforts have been slightly off lately, (I also have had disinterest in baking lately, so they likely go hand in hand ) my kourabiedes didn’t turn out this week and I messed up my banana bread because I forgot to add sugar.

Bible reading, finished the gospels (man did they feel shorter than I thought they would) and 3 chapters into acts. I like Luke’s writing style, can’t explain why but I do.

Cold snap here has made feeding and watering animals a little more tedious, I’m getting chicken eggs regularly (averaging 3-4 a day at this point) , and getting 5-6 quail eggs a day. this weekend I am going to a farm swap in hopes of buying some more laying hens and pullets.

Looking forward to spring!

Best,

A

country life, faith, happiness, hospital, legal, Travel

And so it goes…

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Random musings for the week:

So, me writing daily just isn’t going to happen, I think of things I want to write all day, I even say them in my head and sort them and everything but then I decide that no real audience exists for a 49 year old woman’s rants or whatever.

Here are some of my thoughts for the week though:

I’ve been clearing more and more on my land with the Greenworks zero turn, it can really do some damage and is a little powerhouse. I was afraid it wouldn’t be and also was afraid to try a zero turn…:I won’t say she doesn’t have flaws (she should come with 2 full sets of batteries so you have less down time and the left front guide tire on mine has been off its wheel base since the day I bought it, which makes it hard to control at times but I also don’t know that I’d know how to get it back on myself.

I spent a few days last week looking through my months of January and February last year. I still feel I should have recourse against this hospital (as well as the one here in town for a completely different incident). I believe I’ll look again for a lawyer to talk to, my problem is, these lawyers don’t even care enough to have a conversation with you past looking at medical records. I get that the hospitals write all their stuff up just so…but sometimes it’s just not reality (I’m sorry I’ve been a nurse way too long and seen way too much over the years to think it is.

Goats should be due with babies around April 13-15, I look forward to that. My new quail have had a few hiccups (lost 6 of the 28 in less than a week due to me getting an inadequate shelter for them and having little to no visibility on their wellbeing. I have them in proper shelter now and can see them and have good accounts on the remaining birds well being. Unfortunately I also have them in the barn with the barn door open while it’s chilly out, and this means I have other random birds scouting my barn out to build their nests inside.

I still very much want to establish my flock of jubilee Orpington’s as well as a few other Orpington breeds, however I may wait a few years before I pursue that harder.

Can’t wait for my garden this year, have garlic growing full force already.

I’ll write more next week I hope. Hope you’re staying safe in the winter storms if they affect you.

Beat!

Amanda

Christianity, faith, Greek Orthodox, happiness, hello: goodbye, Life, Travel, Uncategorized, wonder

So, mostly a humdrum kind of day today.

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Up and did chores today, didn’t take time to walk to the garden area today because I had other things in my head.

Dental appointment this afternoon, my face is still numb and it’s been nearly 5 hours. Picked picnic stuff up for dinner tonight and had an easy night.

Grabbed a mini rose plant because my husband loved those, going to work on planting a handful of those in between the regular roses this year.

Have an appointment at 10 tomorrow for the truck to get his tires looked at and also to see why the windshield washers aren’t working, went ahead and did most of tomorrows chores tonight.

I’m really into reading my Bible for just over a year now, just got into the gospels this week, 2 chapters into Mark at the moment. Loving the reading.

Watching the chosen, I like most of it but hate when they sneak modern agendas into a timeline it didn’t exist in.

Hope you’re well, have a blessed day/week!!

Amanda

Travel

Happy 2024.

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Hope you’ve had a great day!

Been a busy one here. Normal daily chores and beginning of the year bills for Real estate fees and such. Made black eyed peas and cabbage in the crock pot and also had cheese noodles and smoked sausage tonight for dinner.

Walked a while and did a workout (first supernatural workout of the year ) and some light reading and TV.

Tackled a few small clean up projects and wrote a letter. May write one more before bed.

Tell me about your day? Anything you’re excited about in the new year?

All the best,

Amanda

Travel

Mental health moment

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Just a side note to all, you may have an issue that you see as the same as someone you know because they are generalised with one name.

Depression isn’t the same for everyone, it is not handled or approached the same by everyone, it is not the same degree, it does not have the same impact on everyone. Someone who is outwardly very, very happy/successful/outgoing can be the loneliest and most depressed around you.

Anxiety is not the same for everyone. There is no textbook answer to handle anxiety. No cure all medicine, no ultimate way to help someone through an anxiety attack. Some may prefer that you be there for them, some may get more anxious by trying to continue a conversation. You may have anxiety and think you know what it looks like…but you only know your version, and you can’t define how others see it.

The best you can do is be understanding when someone tells you they are up against something like this. Take it seriously, don’t dismiss and don’t try to make anyone get past whatever they are going through by telling them it’s not real.

This is all I have to share today, have a good one.

~Α