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Christianity, faith

Have you ever…

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Seen a body alive without its soul?

It’s why I feel I understand more what a soul is in life. Corabelle taught me many years ago what it looks like when your soul leaves and your body isn’t allowed to die, at least that’s what my gut tells me I saw.

Cora was a full on spitfire when I first met her. She was known for being full on torment to the nursing staff, hitting, biting, pulling hair when you dressed her. Spitting food or throwing her tray at mealtimes. Never a nice word to say until you got to know her.

I got to know Cora…she was just as pleasant once you did as she had been unpleasant in the months prior. She’d greet you with as much life and vigor as a 5 year old child if you took time to know her and how to approach her. I loved Cora and we spent a lot of time talking over the 4 years I cared for her. She was fun, playful, what my Aussie friend would call cheeky.

Then, one day…Cora just out of the blue told me that an angel told her last night that she was about to die…and she suddenly quit eating, and refused her meds, she told her daughter this same thing when she visited that evening. Her daughter immediately had her removed from our care and taken to a hospital.

Cora came back 3 days later with a feeding tube, all her meds the same except pushed through the feeding tube. Cora though was a different person than the one who left. She stared off into nothingness with a thousand yard stare. She was as lifeless as dressing a 100 lb version of a Barbie, she was breathing but past that, there were no signs she was still Cora.

She lasted a few weeks after she returned, but I never heard her voice again, her eyes never danced again and I couldn’t help but think her soul was already dancing in heaven, her body a mere formality, like a form someone forgot to sign.

Best,

A

Christianity, dance, faith, Greek Orthodox, happiness, hello: goodbye, Life, music

Food for thought #7

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My brethren, do not hold the faith of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Lord of glory, with partiality.† For if there should come into your assembly a man with gold rings, in fine apparel, and there should also come in a poor man in filthy clothes, and you pay attention to the one wearing the fine clothes and say to him, “You sit here in a good place,” and say to the poor man, “You stand there,” or, “Sit here at my footstool,” have you not shown partiality among yourselves, and become judges with evil thoughts? Listen, my beloved brethren: Has God not chosen the poor of this world to be rich in faith and heirs of the kingdom which He promised to those who love Him?† But you have dishonored the poor man. Do not the rich oppress you and drag you into the courts? Do they not blaspheme that noble name by which you are called? If you really fulfill the royal law according to the Scripture, “You shall love your neighbor as yourself,” you do well;† but if you show partiality, you commit sin, and are convicted by the law as transgressors. (James 2:1-9, OSB)

This came up in my daily readings this week.

Ironically, I started going back to church after my husband died, because I felt I needed the fellowship in my life. I also pursued dance class at the same time, taught by a parishioner of my same church.

I don’t fit in either place it seems, though I was excited and eager to be both places, I don’t quite seem ‘good enough’ in either place. Dance class made me feel inept and the instructor cancelled further leasons after just one, citing lack of interest. He restarted them 3 months later but I didn’t bother because of how the initial experience felt to me.

After church, when people gather for fellowship, I end up mostly sitting alone at a table, most already have their people they talk regularly to…I’m simply not one of them and after several weeks, I still wasn’t any closer to being…and I did try.

I don’t tend to have a negative outlook on life or a victim personality…but I’m feeling a little down with regards to these things.

Best,

A

Christianity, country life, faith, happiness, hello: goodbye, Life, malpractice, wonder, wrongful death

I’ve taken a few days off from writing.

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No real reason, just wasn’t exactly feeling inspired I suppose. I am still reading daily and my routine and life haven’t changed much at all.

It’s wet in my part of Alabama, not raining…at the moment but the wetness from the few days we got still hasn’t abated.

I’m sat in my yard, in my favourite chair, I’ve spent a bit of time with my bare feet on the wet mushy ground, the cold wetness hugging my feet as I ‘ground’ myself. I’m listening to Redbirds chirping and the sound of an extremely distant delivery truck backing up and a dog barking half a mile away. The breeze rustles the dead leaves in the trees above me and the ferns clinging to the branches of the tree to my left, and the hairs on my arm which are stood on end because of the briskness of the air. There is a plane somewhere in the distance, an old bomber by the sounds of it, ambling its way invisibly along the horizon. My chickens have finally decided the hawks overhead are a threat, perhaps…or perhaps someone has simply laid a late afternoon egg and has shared the joy with half my flock…who knows?

It’s February, the month I lost my sweetheart, piece at a time. A year ago today we had chemo at some point, I drove him 5 days a week until the unfortunate surgery that started the torturous week and a half until his death. Can’t tell you anything we talked about, can tell you usually he was drained on way home and slept, can also tell you we often had to stop to take over a public restroom. He wasn’t eating much, if at all by this point. I was sad because it felt like he’d already checked out somewhat. He was trying but I don’t think it was himself he was trying for. I miss him, but I’m sad he went through as much as he did, if it was only on my behalf.

I digress, I am at a loss on what more to write at this time.

Best,

A

Christianity, country life, faith

Food for thought #6

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I am the good shepherd; and I know My sheep, and am known by My own. As the Father knows Me, even so I know the Father; and I lay down My life for the sheep. And other sheep I have which are not of this fold; them also I must bring, and they will hear My voice; and there will be one flock and one shepherd.† (John 10:14-16, OSB)

I’ve never had sheep, I’ve only ever had goats and chickens. But I can tell you from experience that getting 2 flocks that are different in nature, be it the age or type of flock or whatever, is a challenge.

I can’t imagine what could have been going through the original flocks (Israel-Jews) head when the concept of a new flock not only being in existence but especially the idea that eventually the 2 flocks would be inevitably one, as they shared one shepherd.

I can tell you that the idea that the sheep know their shepherd isn’t foreign to anyone who owns any type of animals, you learn your animals and what makes them special and how they need to be talked to, what they need to be fed…etc.

I like that Christ spells out a familiarity with his followers in this manner, many may make fun of Christian’s as sheep but to me it’s a slightly different context than they would like you to think of when they shame us as such.

Sheep can be led to slaughter but that’s not what Christ is offering us, he’s offering us to protected by His grace as we go in and out to ‘find pasture’.

Just my ramble thoughts for the day,

Blessings,

A

Christianity, faith, Greek Orthodox, happiness

Food for thought #4

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Wasn’t sure I was going to write this today, been a little out of sorts and tired today.

So when they had eaten breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me more than these?” He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I love You.” He said to him, “Feed My lambs.”† He said to him again a second time, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me?” He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I love You.” He said to him, “Tend My sheep.” He said to him the third time, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me?” Peter was grieved because He said to him the third time, “Do you love Me?” And he said to Him, “Lord, You know all things; You know that I love You.” Jesus said to him, “Feed My sheep. Most assuredly, I say to you, when you were younger, you girded yourself and walked where you wished; but when you are old, you will stretch out your hands, and another will gird you and carry you where you do not wish.”† This He spoke, signifying by what death he would glorify God. And when He had spoken this, He said to him, “Follow Me.” (John 21:15-19, OSB)

This is one of my favorite passages because there’s a story here that means more than just the words on the page: here is the gist-

When Christ asks Peter the first time ‘do you love me?’ If you’re reading the passage in the original Greek…he uses Agape (all encompassing, move heaven and earth kind of love) when Peter answers- he answers him with Filakia (a brotherly, friendship kind of love)

Christ asks again with Agape- Peter answers again with Filakia

Then Christ comes down to Peter’s level and asks him if he loves him-Filakia and Peter, while wearied (I believe with himself ) confirms the Filakia level of love.

I think the biggest lesson to me is that even while he was here among us, he was able to come to us and understand and meet us at our level. (He knows we’re better than we acknowledge or try to be, but he meets us where we are until we understand the concept of moving heaven and earth ourselves with our love for Him.

That’s all I got for today,

All the best

A

Christianity, faith, Greek Orthodox, Life

Food for thought #3

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“You are the salt of the earth; but if the salt loses its flavor, how shall it be seasoned? It is then good for nothing but to be thrown out and trampled underfoot by men.† (Matthew 5:13, OSB)

Salt is good, but if the salt loses its flavor, how will you season it? Have salt in yourselves, and have peace with one another.” (Mark 9:50, OSB)

“Salt is good; but if the salt has lost its flavor, how shall it be seasoned?† It is neither fit for the land nor for the dunghill, but men throw it out. He who has ears to hear, let him hear!” (Luke 14:34-35, OSB)

This one I shared many instances because it’s one that definitely stays with me. Funnily enough I was told yesterday during the discussion aimed at me in a quite mean manner, that I was ‘salty’ actually that I was ‘the saltiest’. Mind you, I wasn’t being salty at the time, and yes…I’m capable and am quite salty at times, but I digress.

I am not sure if how I perceive this one is how it’s meant to be seen, and I’m certainly not trying to steer anyone wrong here, but here is how it reads to me.

Don’t lose who you are in trying to fit in in this world, you have a voice, you have a personality, you have convictions about God, life, and humanity. Don’t let the world take who you are away…because it will, at every angle. If you become a duller, weaker version of you, you get lost in the muddled world we live in.

Stay strong, keep your flavor!

Stay salty my friend,

A

Christianity, faith, Greek Orthodox, happiness, Uncategorized

Food for thought #1

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This is going to be a new series of posts, separate from my day to day. Based on my own thoughts on some of my favorite Bible verses and my own reflections on them. Things I think about while doing simple things such as doing the dishes or feeding the animals around my little homestead. They are my own personal take and thoughts. That, to me, is the Joy of God’s Word, it pertains to you how it pertains to you, its ‘living’ in that even that meaning changes throughout your life. So…here goes:

“Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you cleanse the outside of the cup and dish, but inside they are full of extortion and self-indulgence. Blind Pharisee, first cleanse the inside of the cup and dish, that the outside of them may be clean also. (Matthew 23:25-26, OSB)

This isn’t the only time this thought process is presented to us in The Word and it’s one that plays often in my mind, especially when I’m doing dishes, (also I feel that so many of the things shared with us were meant to be relatable to everyday life (planting, cleaning…) because they’re meant to bring the verses or thoughts to mind in the day-to-day of humdrum life.

To me, this verse is telling us to worry more about our thoughts, and even our words that come out of our mouth than we are our outward appearance.

Let’s face it, you can spend two to three hundred on a really nice outfit, and go out to hit the town, and if you treat people hatefully or rudely, or even if you are thinking hateful or rude thoughts (believe me when I say that these do spill over into your actions and mannerisms) all the finery in the world doesn’t make you a better person.

I believe Christ meant it more in the contact of sinning, don’t think about what others have in a manner that is jealous or plot to take what someone else has away. Don’t think hateful thoughts about other people, wishing ill of them or wishing their demise. These are what lead to things like theft, adultery, and even murder…you generally get consumed with the thoughts before you take the first step towards hurting another person in this manner.

Anyway basically, my general thought on it is ‘keep your thoughts in check, and you won’t have things to ask forgiveness for further down the road’

All the best

A

Christianity, faith, Greek Orthodox, happiness, hello: goodbye, Life, Travel, Uncategorized, wonder

So, mostly a humdrum kind of day today.

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Up and did chores today, didn’t take time to walk to the garden area today because I had other things in my head.

Dental appointment this afternoon, my face is still numb and it’s been nearly 5 hours. Picked picnic stuff up for dinner tonight and had an easy night.

Grabbed a mini rose plant because my husband loved those, going to work on planting a handful of those in between the regular roses this year.

Have an appointment at 10 tomorrow for the truck to get his tires looked at and also to see why the windshield washers aren’t working, went ahead and did most of tomorrows chores tonight.

I’m really into reading my Bible for just over a year now, just got into the gospels this week, 2 chapters into Mark at the moment. Loving the reading.

Watching the chosen, I like most of it but hate when they sneak modern agendas into a timeline it didn’t exist in.

Hope you’re well, have a blessed day/week!!

Amanda